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> Get Articles > Family > Keeping It In the Family

Keeping It In the Family


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Elena Fawkner
janahbbo.com

A Home-Based Business Online
http://www.ahbbo.com


Keeping It In the Family



© 2002 Elena Fawkner



I'm sure you've heard this dreaded statistic before: the failure

rate of all start-up businesses is around the 90% mark. Add

to that the further distinctly unpleasant fact that roughly 50%

of all marriages end in divorce and you can quickly see that

the odds of your new small business succeeding, already

slim, become positively anorexic if you run your business in

partnership with your spouse.



So, what are some of the key challenges faced by newly

entrepreneurial couples and what can YOU do to reduce

the chances of becoming a statistic?



RELATIONSHIP



A structure is only as strong as the foundation upon which

it's built. If you're in business with your spouse, the

foundation of your structure is the relationship. That needs

to be like bedrock before you even *contemplate* starting

a business together.



Make sure you honestly assess your commitment to the

business and to each other up front. Do you share the same

family values and desires? Do you plan to have (more)

children? If so, how do you accommodate family

responsibilities and build a business at the same time?



Discuss these issues before they arise. The last thing you,

your business, your relationship or your family needs are

nasty surprises. If you simply assume your spouse will cut

back on the business and assume the lion's share of the

parenting responsibilities, think again. Your spouse may

be making the same assumption ... about you!



Preserve and nurture what's led you to where you are

today: your relationship with each other. And that may not

be as easy as it sounds.



At least in the early days of the business, your relationship

will need to thrive on a lack of quality 'couple' time or, indeed,

any time at all! It is by no means unusual for new business

owners to be working 16 hours a day, 7 days a week to get

their businesses off the ground. That's one very important

reason why your relationship needs to be in good shape

before you go into business together. You don't want to

be subjecting a relationship in trouble to that sort of

pressure.



Look for ways to retain romantic intimacy. When you're

working 16/7 that won't happen by itself. One good idea is

to schedule 'dates' on a regular basis. Even once a week

can make all the difference. Just make sure you don't

use the time to talk shop. This is supposed to be romantic

time for the two of you as a couple. Tomorrow's the time to

discuss business and it will be here soon enough!



You can, I'm sure, think of many other ways to keep romance

alive. Start little rituals, such as candlelight dinner breaks,

for example. The important thing is to always stay aware of

this area of your relationship and don't let it slide, no matter

how absorbed you both become in your new business.



You'll probably find you take it in turns being vigilant in this

area.



DIVISION OF RESPONSIBILITY



It is absolutely crucial that each of you has your own clearly

defined areas of sole responsibility. Any business needs one

and only one person to make a final decision. This

doesn't mean that one person makes all the decisions, it

just means that one person makes the final decision in his

or her area of sole responsibility.



Start by allocating business responsibilities between you and

having a very clear understanding that each of you has final

decision-making authority in your respective areas. Under no

circumstances should you encroach on your partner's area

of responsibility and/or override his or her decisions. Start

doing that and the cracks WILL begin to appear, I kid you not!

Sure, consult each other when making decisions. That's

what business partners do, after all. But the ultimate

decision-making authority must rest with the one who has

overall responsibility for the relevant area of the business.



The business is not the only area where responsibility

needs to be divided. Don't forget to allocate responsibility

for household chores and parenting responsibilities. Who is

to do the grocery shopping, the laundry, the cleaning and

bill payments?



COMMUNICATION



Each of you should treat the other just as you would a

respected colleague outside the business. So show each

other the same respect, courtesy, appreciation and

gratitude that you would show any valued co-worker.



No matter how well people get along, disagreements about

certain aspects of the business are inevitable. And just as

in any other business, what is important is how those

disagreements are resolved.



A clear agreement on division of responsibility is a very good

start and having already agreed that one of you has final

decision-making authority in your respective areas means

that there is always a means for resolution of the

disagreement - a final decision. Otherwise you'd find

yourselves going around in circles, unable to agree, until

finally one of you would take matters into your own hands

out of frustration or you'd simply do nothing. And that's

bad for the business and bad for your relationship.



A good way of communicating about business issues is

to hold regular business meetings together. Perhaps a

Monday morning partners' meeting would work well for

you, or lunch on Wednesdays, perhaps. Although the

idea of a meeting may seem a little formal at first given

your relationship outside of the business, keep in mind

that the disciplines you find in an external business are

there for a reason. They keep the business on track and

keep everyone focused on the task at hand. So take

time on a regular basis to regroup, take stock, stay up

to date with where the business is, where it's headed and

what each of you is working on and planning.



By holding meetings like this you also avoid 'spillover' of

the business into your personal time of which there is

precious little to begin with. Which brings us to the

next point.



KEEP BUSINESS AND HOME SEPARATE



The ultimate success of your business depends upon both

of you making decisions based on what's best for the

business. If you are not prepared to do this, then your

business is doomed to failure. Really think about what

this means before you start out. Do you - BOTH of you -

have what it takes to do that? When the time comes will

you forego that vacation to Hawaii to plough the money

back into the business? Will you? Are you sure? What

if the relationship's starting to get a bit shaky? Will you

still do it?



It follows from what was said above that the business is

something separate from the relationship/home. This is

necessary for the survival of the business. Equally, it is

necessary for the survival of your relationship.



What are some of the things you can do to keep business

and home separate?



= Set Business Hours



Set regular business hours and stick to them. Except

in an emergency, what doesn't get done in business

hours doesn't get done until the next day.



= Don't Let Business Intrude on Personal Time



Personal time is all that time outside of regular

business hours. Jealously protect it from encroachment

by the business. If the business line rings at 7:30 pm

and business hours ended at 6:30 pm, let the answering

machine pick it up. In other words, shut the door on

the business at the end of the day.



= Don't Let Home Intrude on Business



Just as you must jealously guard your personal time,

so too you must insulate the business from intrusions

on the home front. So, when friends who know you

work from home suggest you play hookey to hang out

with them during business hours, say no. Schedule

hanging out with friends for your personal time.



If you're at odds with each other about something to do

with your personal lives, don't let it affect how you work

together in the business. Focus on the task at hand,

not your feelings about the personal issue. If it's getting

in the way, resolve it. Don't let resentment undermine

your working effectiveness.



OTHER ISSUES



Finally, there's a myriad of issues that are deserving of

whole articles in themselves. They're listed here just as

thought starters.



= Family Demands



If you have children, there may be times when family

demands can shift the commitment to the business of

one or either of you. During such times, make sure it's

only one of you whose commitment has shifted. Plan for

what you will do if, for example, a child gets sick.



= Outside Interests



To keep your relationship fresh and interesting, you should

both pursue interests that are independent of the business

and each other.



= Separate Space



You live and work together. That's a LOT of togetherness.

Everyone needs personal space. If possible, have separate

work areas so you're not under each other's feet ALL the

time.



= Capital Sufficiency



Make sure you have sufficient capital to sustain you through

the start-up phase of your business.



= Where Did They Get the Money for That?



Has your business capital come from family sources? If so,

beware scrutiny of your expenditure from family members. It is

common for entrepreneurial couples with family money backing

them to feel like they have to justify the necessity for a particular

item of expenditure, particularly if unrelated to the business.



= What if the Relationship Ends?



Particularly if the business is your sole means of livelihood,

think about having a plan for what happens to the business if

the relationship ends. While no-one likes contemplating such

an eventuality, the fact is that half of all marriages end

in divorce. Those are pretty high odds. You may agree

that you will both continue with the business; one of you may

buy the other out; or the business may be sold in toto with

the profits being divided between you.



= Succession Planning



If your business is successful, what will you do when you

exit the business?



= Business Failure



Finally, consider your financial position if the business fails.

Not only are you out of work but so is your partner. This is

a very different proposition from a business being run by

only one spouse. At least then the other spouse is still

bringing a paycheck home. Think about how quickly you

will both be able to return to paid employment if the

worst happens.



The prospect of running a successful business with our mate

is the dream of many. It is natural to want to share as

much as possible with our partner. But it is not for the faint-

hearted and there are many issues to take into account.

Don't make your decision based on visions of romantic

togetherness. The reality will be altogether very different.

But if, with eyes wide open and having taken all of the above

factors into account, you believe you can be successful in

business together, by all means go for it!



------



** Reprinting of this article is welcome! **

This article may be freely reproduced provided that: (1) you

include the following resource box; and (2) you only mail to

a 100% opt-in list.



Here's the resource box to use if reprinting this article:



------



Elena Fawkner is editor of A Home-Based Business Online ...

practical business ideas, opportunities and solutions for the

work-from-home entrepreneur.

http://www.ahbbo.com





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